Getting the Love You Want:
A Guide for Couples
By Harville Hendrix, Ph.D.
Available in:
Paperback
Audio Cassette
Book Review
When Harville Hendrix writes about relationships, he discusses them not just as an educator and a therapist, but as a man who has himself been through a failed marriage. Hendrix felt the sting of his divorce intensely because he believed it signaled not only his failure as a husband but also his failure as a couples counselor. Investigating why his marriage dissolved led him to start looking into the psychology of love. Marriage, he ultimately discovered, is the "practice of becoming passionate friends."
As a result of his research, Hendrix created a therapy he calls Imago Relationship Therapy. In it, he combines what he's learned in a number of disciplines, including the behavioral sciences, depth psychology, cognitive therapy, and Gestalt therapy, to name just a few. He expounds upon this approach in Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples. His purpose in writing the book, he says, is "to share with you what I have learned about the psychology of love relationships, and to help you transform your relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship."
Divided into three sections, the book covers "The Unconscious Marriage," which details a marriage in which the remaining desires and behavior of childhood interfere with the current relationship; "The Conscious Marriage," which shows a marriage that fulfils those childhood needs in a positive manner; and a 10-week "course in relationship therapy, " which gives detailed exercises for you and your partner to follow in order to learn how to "replace confrontation and criticism ... with a healing process of mutual growth and support." The text is occasionally dry and technical; however, the information provided is valuable, the case studies are interesting, and the exercises are revealing and helpful. By utilizing his program, Hendrix hopes you too will be able to solve your marital difficulties without the expense of a therapist. --Jenny Brown
Book Description
Bestselling author Dr. Harville Hendrix offers warm, intelligent advice
for transforming an intimate relationship into a lasting source of love
and companionship.
Dr. Hendrix, a marriage therapist and pastoral counselor, has divided
his helpful recommendations into 3 stages. First, he chronicles the fate
of most relationships-attraction, romantic love and the power struggle
-- and suggests ways for you and your partner to identify the conflicts
associated with each of them. Then, he explores methods for achieving
a "Conscious Marriage," where the early phases of romance are rekindled
and confrontation is slowly replaced by growth and support. Finally, Dr.
Hendrix incorporates these ideas into a unique therapeutic course, offering
a series of proven step-by-step exercises that lead to insight, resolution
and revitalization.
If you're not getting the love you want from the person you're with, you need to do something about it. Dr. Hendrix tells you what that something is. Synopsis Here is an extraordinary practical guide to resolving problems, using 16 exercises to enhance communication, stop self-defeating behavior, and achieve mutual emotional satisfaction. With Hendrix's advice, the all-too-common marital power struggle can be gradually transformed into a mutually beneficial process of spiritual and emotional growth.
Synopsis
Bestselling author Hendrix offers warm, intelligent advice for transforming an intimate relationship into a lasting source of love and companionship. --This text refers to the audio cassette edition of this title
Synopsis
This book will help any couple find the love they want hidden under all the concealing confusion of a close and intimate relationship. I have seen these principles in application and they work! --James A. Hall, M.D.